Aw, hell. I shouldn’t write this now. It’s late, for one thing, and I’m unhappy for another. But:
Given that title, and given that spoilerific picture on the BBC website (blast them), I didn’t have a good feeling about this. We have recap of the previous episode, and then opening titles, and then: Earth.
This is the story of our planet, Earth, of the day a thousand years past when we came to share it with a race known as humanity. It is the story of the Doctor, who helped our races find common ground, and of the terrible losses he suffered. It is the story of our past, and must never be forgotten.
“Terrible losses”? Plural? Ohhhh… damn.
(And that’s IT – I don’t care how many pictures I can find there, I am NOT going back to the BBC website until after I’ve seen every bloody episode -and probably not then because it still won’t be safe because they’ll work very hard at spoiling the next lot of episodes. “Goodbye Amy”?? Well, the hell with you too.)
I have a few quotes written down, but I don’t feel like typing them, not even the celery one. Nor do I feel like using pictures – I didn’t see any of the important bits. The Doctor and Nasreen discover that the endless-looking cityscape they stumbled on isn’t as bad as they (or she, at least, and we) thought it was, because most of the inhabitants are still asleep. The Doctor decides to try going in the front door, and is very shortly gassed. The medical-type Silurian who was just about to dissect Amy is called away to deal with the new prisoners, and Amy, having picked his pocket and gotten the device that unlocks the shackles, frees Mo and they set off to try to escape. Within a minute they come across Mo’s son Elliott, in apparent suspended animation, and can’t get him out, so Mo’s plan is to go get weapons and the white-coated lizard guy and make him free Elliott.
Meanwhile, the Doctor and Nasreen are taking up pretty much where Amy and Mo left off, except the Doctor doesn’t take well to the decontamination procedure, not being human, and … oh, so on.
Meanwhile, upstairs, the captive Silurian – Alaya (the same actress, Neve McIntosh, also played her sister Restac – beautifully similar but not identical makeup, I wasn’t sure it was the same woman) taunts the ones holding her – Rory, Tony Mack, and Ambrose (and seriously, why is a woman named Ambrose??) – until Ambrose shows the true colors already glimpsed in the first episode (when the Doctor had to talk her out of her weapons cache, which she never did put away like he asked – nicely): weak and incompetent belatedly protective mum. (Sorry – not planning on being nice to her any time soon.) Alaya said one of them was going to kill her, and she knew who it would be – and she fulfilled her own prophecy by pushing Ambrose’s buttons (the gard’s name in Ballykissangel is Ambrose. He’s a man. Just sayin’) until Ambrose tasers her to death. Oops. I didn’t mean to. Stupid cow.
Down below, things progress apace, with the Doctor talking non-stop until it has some effect – and the white-coated Silurian shows up just as Restac is about to start a-killin’ folk, with someone in tow who must be important because he’s wearing robes. And for the rest of the episode, the white-coat – Malohkeh – is adorable and cuddly, and occasionally sad-eyed, and – wait. Isn’t this the same fellow who earlier dissected Mo? ALIVE?? Yeah, thought so. The Doctor proclaims that he rather loves him. Here, not so much. Sorry – I have a little trouble reconciling “planning on hurting every human in sight to death” to “look how sweet he is because he loves the wittle childwen”.
I am cranky, aren’t I.
So one thing leads to another – Amy and Nasreen almost negotiate a really amazing future for the planet with the robed-one, Eldane – “We work together, this planet could achieve greatness!” – only to have it all snatched away because on one side Restac is too blind to see the possibility and just wants all the apes dead so they can have the planet back, and on the other side because – did I mention what a criminal idiot Ambrose was? I don’t think I made the point clear enough … without her idiocy, there might have been a golden age … And other things wouldn’t have happened. Maybe the negotiations would have completely fallen through because the military was so … military – but maybe, just maybe, the Doctor could have talked them all into submission and things might have happened.
There aren’t any pictures, that I found (not that I have the heart to look too hard) of Tony carrying the body of Alaya, wrapped in a red blanket, into the council chamber.
Anyway. Since Alaya’s dead, everything goes to hell, and the humans and the Doctor – and Eldane – wind up running for it, and they wind up back in the lab. One thing leads to another, and it’s decided that the Silurians will have to hibernate for another thousand years, and these humans here will have to start rehabilitating humanity: all three of them, since Nasreen and Tony are staying behind. No prob. But, seriously – it will all only go to hell again if the military wakes up in the same mood.
Then – again – there are about twelve minutes left to save themselves (not the world this time, not yet), and off they all run – after the Doctor’s had a nice long lingering goodbye chat with Nasreen – and oh, finally, there’s the TARDIS. In go the 2020 humans, since they’re not necessary for this bit, and the Doctor and Companions realize that there’s a crack. Right there. Coincidentally close to the TARDIS. It’s getting wider. And the Doctor muses that where there is an explosion, there’s shrapnel, and over the protests of the other two reaches in with a hanky in his hand. Perhaps it was flame-retardant or anti-radioactive or something. And he grabs hold of something, and doesn’t have time to see what it was because all his farting around has given Restac enough time to haul her poisoned-but-not-dead-yet carcass after them, and she fires her weapon, and Rory leaps to protect Amy – and is shot. He has just enough time for some moving last words, and then goes. And the Doctor realizes that the light from the crack in the wall is reaching him. He hauls Amy, kicking and screaming, into the TARDIS, locks her in, and sets about trying to take off, and then diverts to trying to help her hold on to her memories of him, because if she doesn’t it will be as if he never existed. Oops. There he goes. A minute later Amy’s happy as a clam and wanting to go to Rio after all.
There aren’t any pictures of the Doctor bodily carrying Amy away from Rory’s corpse.
They drop off the 2020’s, what’s left of them, where they belong – and exactly how are they going to explain to whomever they work for and/or authorities about the exploded drill and the missing scientists/engineers? The Doctor gives Ambrose an anti-pep-talk, advising her to change her name – well, no, but he should have – and Amy happily skips back into the TARDIS. The Doctor pauses, and pulls out that red hanky for the shrapnel he salvaged (and that’s not the right word, I think), and finds that it’s a piece of the Public Call Box sign… Well, crap. That’s not good. And when I’m too down-hearted to even take advantage of a lovely pun like “that’s not a good sign”, you know I’m in a bad way.
The voice of Eldane wraps up the episode going on about even greater losses to come.
Yay. Something to look forward to. Thanks. I liked Rory. I’m beginning to worry about XI’s ineffectualness. He can’t hit the broadside of a century, and his geography is iffy at best, and so far I think he’s put more people at risk than he’s saved – or saved them only because he contributed to putting them at risk in the first place. I wasn’t looking forward to this episode – I had a bad feeling – and now I’m not looking forward to the remaining … four. River Song notwithstanding.
I want X back. I want David Tennant back.